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by Michael J. Nelson Published 2003 If you recall my review of "Mind Over Matters", you'll remember that I made a solemn vow to buy everything that Mike Nelson writes. Now, that obviously does not include things like grocery lists or letters to his uncle. That would cross the line from fan to stalker, I am told by my lawyers. So I have to amend that vow and limit it only to published works. Anyway, true to my word, I have recently purchased Mr. Nelson's newest book, "Mike Nelson's Death Rat!". "Death Rat!" is Mike Nelson's first novel. It is the story of Pontius Feeb, an aging writer of obscure history books, who writes a cheesy novel about a six-foot rat. He is unable to get it published because he doesn't have the right "look" for an adventure writer. So he hires a ruggedly handsome actor, Jack Ryback, to pretend to have written the book. But Jack unintentionally tells the publisher that it is non-fiction. So to cover their tracks, Jack and Ponty go to Holey, MN and convince all 38 residents to cover for them and pretend that the rat thing really happened. Then there is some stuff with a rival author and a disturbing funk star and a new rat-based religion. But you'll have to buy it for details of all that stuff. "Death Rat!" made me laugh out loud just as much as Mike's previous two books. It is a well-crafted story with engaging characters. And I've never read so much use of the word "moist" in a non-sexual context in any other book in my life. It was a fast and completely enjoyable read. It will especially appeal to people from Minnesota, but I think that the humor is accesible to anyone. In case you are not yet convinced to buy this masterpiece, here is a sample of some dialogue from pages 270 and 271. (It of course was written by Mike Nelson and he owns all the rights to it and all.) They had found their cabin, unloaded their belongings, and staked claim on their separate rooms when Stig appeared in Bromstad's door naked save for the towel he was holding. Since this was really covering only a portion of the four fingers on his right hand, he was in practice naked. Bromstad shrieked, calmed himself, and then summed the situation up accurately. "You are as naked as a newborn." "Yes." "Will this be happening frequently during our stay together? If so, I'll need to make some plans to blind myself." "I'm going to the sauna." "There's a sauna?" "Yes. It's fifty yards on toward the lake." "And you're going there naked?" "Yes." "I see you have a towel. Might you not want to use that to cover things?" "No." "I strongly advise it. "The Danish way is to sauna naked." "And to actually go to the sauna naked as well?" "When one has one's aquavit stowed in one's towel, yes. Are you ashamed of the male body, Mr. Bromsted?" "Yes. Deeply. It is a travesty of engineering." This book is strange and funny and wonderful, like Mike Nelson himself. I'd recommend it to anyone who has the ability to read. (And if you don't, how are you reading this?) |